The top three are singing “Ain’t No Stopping Us Now,” and again I ask, really? All the songs in the musical ‘verse to choose from, and we get that cheeseball song?

Crappy Ford commercial. “Heaven.” This week they didn’t even try, did they?

56 million votes last night. I didn’t bother, because I can never get through on anyone’s line if I call after 9 p.m. here. So if David Cook doesn’t make the final, you can blame me. I take full responsibility.

We’re recapping, we’re recapping, and now it’s my favorite moment from last night. The Archtweener of Cluelessbury singing about my boobs. Awesome. Now if that had happened on the same night that Paula judged Jason’s second song before he sang it, I might still be hyperventilating.

Um. Fantasia’s on stage right now, singing a song called “Bore Me,” and amen to that. No, back it up, I take that back. This very well may be the most craptaculasmic performance ever on that stage. I can’t believe I voted for her. Seriously, I had to pause it and take a break, because I couldn’t take it. Hey look, Sabrina Bryan in the audience. ROFL, the look on Simon’s face. He can’t believe he voted for her either, apparently.

Ryan wants to know if he can start the drama now. He brings out David Archuleta, who takes solace in the knowledge that if he goes home tonight, he’ll still have the very important task of carrying the Ring to Mordor to save Middle Earth. We get to watch the Archtweener’s trip home to Utah. Oh, and I’m so happy because we get to listen to him sing “Imagine” while we watch the clip. Hooray.

Now we get to watch the Archtweener’s going home video, since we won’t get to see it next week. But the awesome thing about it is we don’t have to hear Ruben Studdard sing; instead we get the uber-talented Graham Colton. I love him (even have his CD from 2003 or 2004 back when he was playing bars in Dallas, before the name change to Graham Colton Band and the second name change to Graham Colton).

Syesha went back to Florida. Awww. Her dad’s still clean. That’s awesome. She’s crying even more than Archy cried on his trip home. Kids these days.

Ryan asks Syesha if Pauler’s comments last night were harsh. Simon says they were a little over the top. Syesha’s going home video, set to “I Believe.”

David Cook’s turn. David, why so sad? Why so detached? Why so subdued, word nerd? Huh. It wasn’t David’s idea to audition; he was there in Omaha to provide moral support for his brother. Producer came up with a camera, David said, no, I’m not auditioning, he is. Producer said now you are, and so now, if David wins, his brother gets half of everything. His brother did the whole hometown tour with him, and David went to visit his elementary school music teacher.

I like his going home video. Feel a little bad for his brother, though.

Simon says if it’s the final he’s hoping for, it’ll be a real humdinger next week. Pauler and Randy are up in arms over the use of the word humdinger, because apparently it’s way too sophisticated for them to have ever heard of it.

David Archuleta is in the final. David Cook is, too! Yay for David Cook! I think David Cook with either one would be a good finale, but a finale without David Cook wouldn’t have been worth watching. Help us, David Cook, you’re our only hope for a good finale.

Anyway, Syesha sings herself out, and next week David Cook puts the beatdown on the Archtweener.

More American Idol.